Each day, the Dean of Students issues his memo for that day's activity and important announcements. Here is a sample.
Deans’ Memo
Sunday April 1, 2012
Issue # 69
Sunday, April 1 Agenda
1900-2000 – Meet the Stow Away Students! Does it seem like there are a ton of new people you don’t recognize? After spending the last 9 weeks dodging the security team, our interport stow aways are coming out of their life boat hiding places and will share their impressions of our community as overheard from hiding.
· 2000-2100 – Explorer Seminar: Ineffective Birth Control Options. Farrell Saunders. Although many people think spending time with the dependent children is the best form of birth control, Farrell will dispel that rumor and share other sure ways to end up with 4 kids. (Union)
· 1900-2000 – Career Spotlight: Exotic Pole-Dancing. Considering a career in pole-dancing? Come this evening to talk with professionals in the field and get a strategy to map out your career path. We’ve gotten special permission to hold this seminar in the Glazer Lounge due to the number of poles and the adult content (Glazer Lounge)
· 1900-2000 – Engine Room & Galley Tour! You’ve asked for it and now you get it. Get a guided tour of the engine room and help change the ship’s oil and top off the antifreeze. Then head to the galley and see how all the food is made. While you are there, slice some potatoes for dinner tonight. (Glazer Lounge)
· 1900-2000 – Flip Flop Club. Do you love your flip flops? Come share your best bonding moments from your voyage around the world with your favorite flip flops. (Pool Deck)
· 2100-2200 –Sick People: A Photographic Journey. Dr. Bill Yeaton will present a photography based travelogue on being a doctor and will show pictures of some of the nastiest things he has seen during his time as a doctor. (Union)
· 2100-2200 – Photo Club! Please bring your 3 best photos of sunsets, your friends doing peace signs, and puppies on a flash drive to share for a photo critique. (Classroom 3)
· Tonight’s time changes:
Deck 2
Back 1 hour
Deck 3
Ahead 1 hour
Deck 4
Ahead 3 hours
Deck 5
No change
Deck 7
Ahead 17 minutes
Anyone late to class will get dock time.
Announcements
Want Credit for Your FDPs? All records of FDP participation have been accidentally erased. Students are requested to write a 1-page synopsis for each FDP they have participated in to verify their attendance. Please stop by the Field Office to submit your FDP credit requests or no credit will be given.
Pool Bar Closure. Due to the abundance of left over pork, pasta, and potatoes, the Deck 7 Pool Bar will be closed for the remainder of the voyage. All meals will be served in the Decks 5 & 6 dining rooms.
Fresh Water Consumption. We are low on our water consumption. Please take longer showers, do more laundry, and join our community wide squirt gun fight tomorrow on the Pool Deck.
Reinventing the Wheel Competition. Come cheer your favorite staff members on as they compete in the reinvent the wheel competition. Watch as they are given conflicting information and limited supplies and are asked to figure out how to pull this off for the 108th time.
Wellness Center Sale! 50% off all spray tanning and manscaping services.
Let’s Water Ski! The Captain has agreed to one day of water skiing off the back of the ship. Sign-ups at the Activities Desk in Tymitz Square.
Sick of Those Tan Lines? The 8th Deck will be open for nude tanning for the remainder of the voyage.
Information from the Captain and Crew
We are sick of cleaning up after you.
From now on you have to make your own bed.
Today’s Quote
“Man up”
– Lynette Cook-Francis
Laundry Service
April 1: Do your own laundry.
Happy Un-Birthday!
To everyone who’s birthday is from May 2 to January 18.
Question of the Day
Are we there yet?
Yesterday's question: What color are the Captains red glasses?
Answer: Blue
Television Programming
Ch. 2: Documentary about evil corporations (2004, 96min, PG-13)
Ch. 3: Documentary about greedy corporations (2007, 45min, NR)
Ch. 5: Foreign documentary about evil and greedy corporations, with subtitles (1995, 179min, PG)
Ch. 6: Titanic (1998)
Other
field office hours – tymitz sq.
CLOSED
Dining Hours
Breakfast 0700 – 0830
Lunch 1130 – 1330
Dinner 1730 – 1930
Medical Clinic – Deck 2
Hours:
Sick from food poisoning: 0800-0900
Sick from rocking ship: 1630-1730
Sick of your roommate: 1730-1930
Counseling Center – Deck 2
Hours:
See Quote of the Day
Dependent Children’s Program– Main Dining Room
Hours:
0845-1145 Home Schooling
1345-1545 Children’s production of Lord of the Flies
exerpts from the noon bridge report (as of April 1)
Latitude: Dunno
Longitude: Not sure
Sea Depth: Very deep
Distance to nearest land: We have no idea, but we can’t see it from here.
APRIL FOOLS!
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